I've never loved anyone in my life the way I do him. I'm having panic attacks and crying constant ly. Feeling bad about the way I ended it, and missing him so badly. Five years is a long time to share connection and everyday things and I feel like I'm grieving.
I understand your pain and panic. I feel it every second of the day. I too was in love and in constant contact everyday with him for over 5 years. He left his wife a few years ago FOR ME and got sick and tired of waiting for me to divorce my husband.
I just couldn't do it I wanted to but So he went and met someone else and discarded me like I was trash. I am beyond hurt, crushed and in disbelief. I am trying with all my heart and soul to fall back in love with my husband and get my marriage back on track. I have no choice. But all I thnk about is HIM.
It's torture Though I would never recommend an open marriage to people in general, I only wish that people could adopt a little bit of the positive attitude that people have in better open marriages also in polyamory. And that is to recognize that jealousy and wanting to get even and hurt someone else usually achieves nothing good. It does nothing good for the person feeling jealous, and does nothing good for the person you're feeling jealous about.
If you're curious and want to learn more about someone, enter a name on this site . What is it like to have a long term extramarital affair?. Have The Affair You Want & Never Get Caught book. Read reviews from world's largest community for readers. 1 in every couples are having affairs. Nob.
Just way too much energy spent hurting and feeling hurt. In a way, it's a lack of maturity that most people really can't overcome. Hi Laura - I read your post and your a very strong woman, it takes courage to fight for your marriage and an affair is one of the most devastating events someone will face. I recently came across a website to assist with affairs still involved and ended and it helps repair your marriage.
It's marriagehelpers. There are podcasts and articles that are free to assist you with rebuilding your relationship with your husband.
My love and best friend left his wife as well FOR ME, it took me year and a half after to finally leave mine and I oacked up a 16 foot uhaul and drove 12 hours to TN to be with him and my son came with me. Once with him daily, saw a different side I was in a loveless, sexless marriage, he slept in a room downstairs away from me. My son went through a horrid major depression so I was trying not to rock too many boats all at once!
I quit my job to move miles away to be with the "love of my life" and because it took me longer I paid dearly verbally! When he didn't drink it was like I had my best friend again and we had a blast. I still love him dearly with all my heart and soul but I did pack up everything and move yet again to finalize divorce. So jobless, homeless, husbandless, and walked away from my love the hardest thing I've ever had to do he does not agree with me when I ask about alcoholism, verbal abuse, etc..
I really feel for you as I have been on both sides of the fence.
The best advice I can give is that if your husband knows but you are denying it , then come clean as otherwise he will drive himself insane while at the same time slowly destroying your marriage ironic I know but you are now not having an affair. It will initially be very tough but this will distract you away from the other man and all your energy will go into repairing your marriage. For the record, I told my first wife of my affair, she took me back but I decided I wanted a fresh start.
We are now great friends. My second wife is in your position now. I really feel for you. If you want to email then let me know. Good luck. I have a similar story as yours. Struggling and don't know what to do. Do you mind contacting me so we can talk?
I'm so sorry to hear that you share my similar story, I hope time has started to help you Heal. I posted that story and checked it religiously for months looking desperately for support in the form of responses and found nothing. Your comment to my story has gotten you a ton of replies and I hope you found some healing support. Please let me know if I can help you in anyway.
I am so glad i found this site! Finally, i been having affair with married man for couple months now, wife has been texting me , blocked mine n his phone numbers, he wants me to stick to his story! He is saying we r just friends , he says he is going to ask for divorce but for now wants me to ignore her texts and not make things worse!
I dont know what to do??? I am still involved with a very similar situation.
Nearly two years. We have been caught. Even after she has blocked everything. We have found ways to communicate. He is pleading for me to have patience.
But my heart is completely crushed, and I have no idea what to do. I want this man and this relationship more than anything in the world, just as he keeps assuring me he want the same. But, the bleeding can't continue. My everyday life, work, etc is suffering. I would love to talk to someone before I completely lose my mind. Visit the website sexandrelationshiphealing for support and help.
Rob has a lot of information there. You can e-mail me through the sexandrelationshiphealing site. This will not permit including an e-mail it seems. I understand how emotional this is for you-it's keeping you from living your best life. But also feel for the betrayed partner. I'd invite you to join Dr. More info on the support website sexandrelationshiphealing. But the person you are involved with gets both of you.
Seems to work out for him but not for either or often there are more people he is involved with. I think we all deserve to have a relationship with someone who can actually show up for us and be honest. Here's the other thing-if he actually does get together with you, chances are he'll cheat on you with someone else. I see this all the time and people are surprised that a relationship that started as cheating doesn't lead to happily and monogamously ever after. I am not judging again, I feel for the betrayed partner who did not sign up for this but invite you to consider what your life could be like with someone who wants a true partnership.
I would love to talk to you, or someone who is "the other woman", even the wife that didn't deserve the hurt. I am tired of hurting, and I don't want her to hurt anymore either. Neither of us deserve to hurt like we do, even him.
Other times, affair partners are looking for a long-term relationship. Laugh at their suspicions instead of getting mad. Then his wife called me, told me I was a homewrecker and to stay away from her man. I often suggest that betrayed partners pretend they're listening from behind a one-way mirror, and I give them an index card to write down their questions, comments, or contradictions. You May Also Like.
Visit the website sexandrelationshiphealing as there is a lot of resources there including podcasts. Rob has more information and help there. There are some similarities between your situation and mine. Your story really hit me as similar. I am in a sexless marriage with a very stress filled person who refuses to find help. I am a bisexual male and have found a boyfriend.
First it was just stupid sex, now we are filled with emotion for eachother. We are working out an official friendship our wives know about so we can go do non-sexual things with eachother. Sure, sexually it's great, but we have found an emotional bond that exceeds what we have with our wives. This has been going on for years. It's difficult and satisfying at the same time. Yes, there's is deception, but both of us have been forced into a situation where the wives we loved emotionally and physically really don't give a damn anymore.
We are basically "extreme buddies" and it works for now. Maybe someday it's won't but I don't think anyone can understand what we have. THere's been plenty of time where we can cool off because we can't see eachother for weeks at a time, but despite that the feelings don't go away. I have no idea where this is headed.